lately there are many things in life that's frustrating me. Apparently, nothing is going MY way.
My boyfriend doesn't function the way I would like him to.
My job is going through changes.
My family is going through changes.
Even this morning, when i wanted to change my hairstyle, I wasn't allowed to!!
My long bangs and hair was frustrating me so I wanted to cut it stylish and short. plus i suddenly feel long hair makes me look old, or mature, however way you put it (BUT which is kind of what i need for my job! argh)
I went to find my stylist and was determined to do SOMETHING!!!
He said my hair wasn't meant to be cut short for the following reasons:
---- my hair is naturally REALLY curly, so either i throw in a lot of money to make it straight permanently all the time, and go back to him once a month to keep my stylish short hair, or I need wait out this medium-frustrating-length-hair period so that my hair has enough weight to keep it somewhat straight. But he said I will need to be patient during these 3 to 4 months because my hair grows thick faster than it grows long faster, so that's why i felt like i had a mop on my head. So I said, i can't cut bangs? he said. No because you got two huge cheek bones that's sticking out so you need to have long bangs to make your face rounder and softer. And he said i need to put in some effort to blow dry my hair a certain so it looks more neat.
My hair has made me realize a lot of things.
I was designed a certain way (curly hair, big cheek bones make my face look square, etc) and i could either go with how I was designed or I could go my own way of doing things BUT that's the harder way (ie. money, time, etc)
It makes me think of how one of the talks from my Breakforth conference talked about God had a dream for me before I was born. He planned me a certain way. He designed me a certain way. And He would love for me to live the way I was planned/designed/dreamed of.
But i realize if I was to go with the way God designed me, I'd have to surrender what I am doing now or how I want things to be done -- AND THAT'S SO HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to a certain extent, i have no control!
It's like i want my hair to not be the way it is right now. Either I hang on tight during this 3 to 4 months of change and transition and strive through hurdles or I give up now and resolve things the way that I would like to make myself feel better, but then a few months later, I would have to go fix myself again because my plans are always flawed as compare to God.
ARGH!!! WHY!!!!!
i'm so frustrated!!!!!!!
Comments (1)
My boyfriend doesn't function the way I would like him to.
笑左
你是說笑的吧-_-